July 29 2015
Aboard Brilliance of
the Seas off Harwich, England
A Night at Faulty Towers
Imagine an English hotel-apartment that was built along the seashore in the 19th Century and had all the appearance of a classic inn. Now imagine that after entering this place with a skeleton-type key you noticed a random collection of furnishings from IKEA and other odd sources that looked dreadfully out of place.
Upon entering the kitchen, you noticed a strange amalgam of
appliances, a few utensils and other items that you could not figure out.
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| Notice how tub fills from ceiling. |
The bedroom was located on the second story, accessible via
a narrow, winding staircase that lacked even rudimentary safety rails.
The upstairs bath had “design” features that must have come from a mental patient. The proprietor, a senior lady, pointed out that, in order to use the modern bathtub, you had to turn on two wall faucets, whereby the water would fill from a nozzle located in the ceiling eight feet above the tub! The apartment also had a stall shower, complete with crumbling tiles and an odd array of horizontal spray nozzles, but no conventional overhead shower head, just a round grille in the ceiling with holes in it. Upon using this novel shower the next morning, we would realize that the overhead shower had inadequate pressure to rinse Donna’s hair. Furthermore, possibly due to some loose shower tiles, water dripped down the staircase when the shower was being used.
The upstairs bath had “design” features that must have come from a mental patient. The proprietor, a senior lady, pointed out that, in order to use the modern bathtub, you had to turn on two wall faucets, whereby the water would fill from a nozzle located in the ceiling eight feet above the tub! The apartment also had a stall shower, complete with crumbling tiles and an odd array of horizontal spray nozzles, but no conventional overhead shower head, just a round grille in the ceiling with holes in it. Upon using this novel shower the next morning, we would realize that the overhead shower had inadequate pressure to rinse Donna’s hair. Furthermore, possibly due to some loose shower tiles, water dripped down the staircase when the shower was being used.
The ponds in the garden were covered with what appeared to
be, green slime. It was obvious that no
outside maintenance had taken place this year.
I could go on, but I think you get the picture.
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| a beautiful morning stroll along the Harwich promenade |
The breakfast, which was included, consisted of an odd array
of items served by a young woman, who obviously never worked in a
restaurant. The food, while decent, was
an strange selection of items.
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| classic Tudor-style homes |
After breakfast, we took a wonderful morning walk along
Harwich’s picturesque beachfront for about an hour. Quite a few dog-walkers were enjoying
the brisk, sunny day and we marveled at the variety of architecture from the
ocean-view homes. A few reminded us of
Toad Hall. Many had as many as 26
chimneys.
We finally packed our bags and our taxi picked us up and transported
us to the cruise port. We were surprised
by the efficiency and courtesy shown to us by the port staff and we were able to board right
away, without any delay.
We were pleased by our stateroom on the Brilliance of the Seas, located at the very bow of the
ship, right behind the bridge and on the starboard side. It was an
inside room, but it seemed larger than those we were used to.
We met with our contact with the cruise staff and found out
that we had been scheduled for two presentations on the next day, something
that rarely happens.
This is really a multinational cruise, with 1000 Brits and
about half as many American passengers.
We also had large contingents of Canadians, Germans,Asians and Israelis.
Now off to bed and ready for work the next day.
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